for what is a man what has he got if not himself then he has naught to say the things he truly feels and no the words of one who kneels
Saturday, November 26, 2011
james hughes and I will destroy this shit
caitlin,
I refuse to loose or bow before others I don't understand why it's a requirement for me to have an identity crisis. This seems to be one of the plot lines developed on the other end/. I refuse this. Their goal is for there to be no such thing as me. I then have to reconstruct myself. I will not live as a human game. Where stars make dreams where dreams make stars. On the way to zuccatti park I see this guy with marilyn manson eyes, I say oi but he misses the hello and this bothers me. The impressions claim he knows I tell myself every other day I'm moving to London when this shit is over. Nobody knows I exist or live with occupy wall street. The broadway mcdonalds is dead and awkward tourist nyc without the cards. I feel this great sadness for what this place was. There's nothing beautiful in here now, just mcdonalds public. A man with a cat on his head is on broadway. I speak to cats every time I encounter one. Give up the fight. I used to only see people in strawberry fields in John Lennon murder anniversary. I wear a strawberry fields button which represents the elder new yorkers who help me on the other end people we get from the bloomberg dimension. "Occupy Tulsa stand with occupy nyc" "we're occupying wall street we're never going away" this makes me happy, the unity despite the death of tents after the attack. I still swear watergate on bloomberg. Knitting for ows occupants women from the paper is here today. I will start filming letters to you soon. I hate the flowers in the park, each tree and plant represents the death of our beautiful base. I meet Jade/Requiem @ charlotte's which is closed, we search for others for a direct action on the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Shout "occupy wall street" affront the media. Use the media for media attention. We need to use the media for free attention for occupy. From Jahan I learn about "the arrestables" who's goal is to have a symbolic arrest record for our political movements. Jahan is a training attorney to get our people out of arrests. The movement has to come together around owning a tv station for this to last beyond a decade or the F.B.I. will take us out.
In the level of mental space there's absolute control of mental space on the other end, none of this is me. I have to create my own mental space even with the medication there was too much control on the other side. Hughes and me get into the train I'm fucked if I don't get $. Need to panhandle and I keep focus on the angel lucifer on my class status I look at my reflection I'm forced to panhandle somebody is controlling my eyes but they never stole my love of the upper class, JFK is this symbol who took the prototype to adderall and was murdered by the bush family (as was JFK jr).
I need to return to williamsburg with $ and my medication promote the creational idea of a tv station through my eyes and this hell via trying to fuck Natalie Portman I need to get to the other side of this, during this period of time when I tried to get Hughes and I pfizer for a williamsburg tv station on Natalie Portman's set I have someone take a photograph of me eating skittles and smoking a cigarette with her, then somebody places child Mike @ 15 into me. They tell me that Kevin from childhood is on the set, they start mentioning all of this shit from childhood and my book that I have no idea about on the other end, what the fuck they're talking about. I'm supposed to take them over the perceptions they build with the little nemo religion. Somebody manipulates my medication tells me that I become the other me, a connecticut version of me. This hard nothing to do with reality, I'm supposed to get rid of these people with meditation but I never do and whoever the fuck is on the other end creates something on their end that has nothing to do with trying to make a brooklyn tv station out of a new york city economy/religion.
Modern day ->
On rockaway avenue I reflect on the Sarah Ritch globe where Manhattan upper class represent Democratic/Republican. Where Caroline Kennedy is my symbol of this. These are references in my mind
to when the world reflects reality, my true beliefs and economic status. The reason to be illumanti is to destroy the neo conservatives. These notebooks I keep writing these notes in are piling up.
The people on the other end don't want me to have any form of control on my own end, or want me to disagree with Hughes so they can bring back a world where I have to summon people to steal, to eat, to find clothing and everything is associated to defeating a villain. Where I owe everything to someone else.
And if I fuck me I'll fuck me in my own way.
I didn't see this fucking dead kid ryan who never got me my medication in a hospital in bridgeport years ago in this hell while listening to this to associate to bowing before others. I was not raised by Gunnar Agerholm to bow before people. They've made me a fuck up and force me to sleep to invent a world.
I listen to the Arcade Fire. This means class status. The reason I refuse to listen to a cd player despite somebody having stole my iPod. Because Apple means class status.
Because I will die before I let these people on the other end make me apart of the lower class.
I'm pretty sure they want me to endlessly carry the notebooks. Or they want me to bow before the girl I dated when I was 15. I will die before I bow before these people. This will be your $, the $ from this shit.
In childhood I spent every weekend at the Agerholm's this is where I get my Fairfiel roots.
I notice the back of the notebook I didn't label has "in 98 we all rotate" this is a message in art to myself from one of the fragments in my soul.
I refuse to play this as a game. The people on the other end make it difficult to write directly what I have in the notebook. It takes all day with the seizures and the arguments about christie cummings and their artwork through my body. I have to get whoever the fuck this is to go away.
They argue with me about nothing and attempt to put me to sleep.
The art is segmented by #s. I refuse to play this as a game. Not in my fucking body.
I love you. Nobody else on this earth despite the amount of years I was lied to about speaking to you through my fucking body and the worthless hell I live in. A reality worse than suicide.
-Little Nemo
(christopher)
A Caitlin Rodriguez Production
Little Nemo on hbo
11/16/2011
black caitlin heart
the school of visual arts church of silver tiles day 397/8
james hughes days
I refuse to loose or bow before others I don't understand why it's a requirement for me to have an identity crisis. This seems to be one of the plot lines developed on the other end/. I refuse this. Their goal is for there to be no such thing as me. I then have to reconstruct myself. I will not live as a human game. Where stars make dreams where dreams make stars. On the way to zuccatti park I see this guy with marilyn manson eyes, I say oi but he misses the hello and this bothers me. The impressions claim he knows I tell myself every other day I'm moving to London when this shit is over. Nobody knows I exist or live with occupy wall street. The broadway mcdonalds is dead and awkward tourist nyc without the cards. I feel this great sadness for what this place was. There's nothing beautiful in here now, just mcdonalds public. A man with a cat on his head is on broadway. I speak to cats every time I encounter one. Give up the fight. I used to only see people in strawberry fields in John Lennon murder anniversary. I wear a strawberry fields button which represents the elder new yorkers who help me on the other end people we get from the bloomberg dimension. "Occupy Tulsa stand with occupy nyc" "we're occupying wall street we're never going away" this makes me happy, the unity despite the death of tents after the attack. I still swear watergate on bloomberg. Knitting for ows occupants women from the paper is here today. I will start filming letters to you soon. I hate the flowers in the park, each tree and plant represents the death of our beautiful base. I meet Jade/Requiem @ charlotte's which is closed, we search for others for a direct action on the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Shout "occupy wall street" affront the media. Use the media for media attention. We need to use the media for free attention for occupy. From Jahan I learn about "the arrestables" who's goal is to have a symbolic arrest record for our political movements. Jahan is a training attorney to get our people out of arrests. The movement has to come together around owning a tv station for this to last beyond a decade or the F.B.I. will take us out.
In the level of mental space there's absolute control of mental space on the other end, none of this is me. I have to create my own mental space even with the medication there was too much control on the other side. Hughes and me get into the train I'm fucked if I don't get $. Need to panhandle and I keep focus on the angel lucifer on my class status I look at my reflection I'm forced to panhandle somebody is controlling my eyes but they never stole my love of the upper class, JFK is this symbol who took the prototype to adderall and was murdered by the bush family (as was JFK jr).
I need to return to williamsburg with $ and my medication promote the creational idea of a tv station through my eyes and this hell via trying to fuck Natalie Portman I need to get to the other side of this, during this period of time when I tried to get Hughes and I pfizer for a williamsburg tv station on Natalie Portman's set I have someone take a photograph of me eating skittles and smoking a cigarette with her, then somebody places child Mike @ 15 into me. They tell me that Kevin from childhood is on the set, they start mentioning all of this shit from childhood and my book that I have no idea about on the other end, what the fuck they're talking about. I'm supposed to take them over the perceptions they build with the little nemo religion. Somebody manipulates my medication tells me that I become the other me, a connecticut version of me. This hard nothing to do with reality, I'm supposed to get rid of these people with meditation but I never do and whoever the fuck is on the other end creates something on their end that has nothing to do with trying to make a brooklyn tv station out of a new york city economy/religion.
Modern day ->
On rockaway avenue I reflect on the Sarah Ritch globe where Manhattan upper class represent Democratic/Republican. Where Caroline Kennedy is my symbol of this. These are references in my mind
to when the world reflects reality, my true beliefs and economic status. The reason to be illumanti is to destroy the neo conservatives. These notebooks I keep writing these notes in are piling up.
The people on the other end don't want me to have any form of control on my own end, or want me to disagree with Hughes so they can bring back a world where I have to summon people to steal, to eat, to find clothing and everything is associated to defeating a villain. Where I owe everything to someone else.
And if I fuck me I'll fuck me in my own way.
I didn't see this fucking dead kid ryan who never got me my medication in a hospital in bridgeport years ago in this hell while listening to this to associate to bowing before others. I was not raised by Gunnar Agerholm to bow before people. They've made me a fuck up and force me to sleep to invent a world.
I listen to the Arcade Fire. This means class status. The reason I refuse to listen to a cd player despite somebody having stole my iPod. Because Apple means class status.
Because I will die before I let these people on the other end make me apart of the lower class.
I'm pretty sure they want me to endlessly carry the notebooks. Or they want me to bow before the girl I dated when I was 15. I will die before I bow before these people. This will be your $, the $ from this shit.
In childhood I spent every weekend at the Agerholm's this is where I get my Fairfiel roots.
I notice the back of the notebook I didn't label has "in 98 we all rotate" this is a message in art to myself from one of the fragments in my soul.
I refuse to play this as a game. The people on the other end make it difficult to write directly what I have in the notebook. It takes all day with the seizures and the arguments about christie cummings and their artwork through my body. I have to get whoever the fuck this is to go away.
They argue with me about nothing and attempt to put me to sleep.
The art is segmented by #s. I refuse to play this as a game. Not in my fucking body.
I love you. Nobody else on this earth despite the amount of years I was lied to about speaking to you through my fucking body and the worthless hell I live in. A reality worse than suicide.
-Little Nemo
(christopher)
A Caitlin Rodriguez Production
Little Nemo on hbo
11/16/2011
black caitlin heart
the school of visual arts church of silver tiles day 397/8
james hughes days
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
when you're young you have ideas and no $ when you're old you have $ and no ideas - how to make it in america (its not tv its hbo)
caitlin,
I am made out of the skyine I see this scene in made in America where they're on the boat and one of the main characters is on a boat affront the skyline for years I have dreamed of a factory that will never be a tv station. When all I needed was my medication to find my way to the other side. I'm with one of our ceos anyone who gets me my medication. I dream I live of our skyline. Of Manhattan. I am made of the island of manhattan, your channel should be at our shore in williamsburg, at the factory that has been the center of my existence since 2008. Just because I dream does not make it real. I love you.
Later in the night I end up @ Goodbye Blue Monday on broadway in east williamsburg. I see one of our occupy wall street signs. This is the way to communicate to me if anybody knew I existed. The band mentions hackers, if art hacking was real in this thing you'd mention this. You'd mention this because I need help to get to the other side. The plague is Harvey Weinstein and I gave the disc to the enemy for a period of time. I am crash overwrite I need help to reach the other side. They play Elton John. You'd mention Elton John if you knew I existed because everything I do in fashion in based on him. I find on the myrtle avenue stop a sin's world hat. I wear this because I have to keep telling myself I'm Lucifer to make sense out of being in this thing which allowed me to spend my $ and destroyed my credit rating.
I watch the video where I throw Dale Carnegie on my roof top in hell's kitchen and I'm manipulated into burning the book Arun gave to me from Easton that I used to place my dream diaries and wrote my religion. Helicopters are in this video, they were for me then not literally but I'm told this. The last time I saw helicopters is when we were attacked by Bloomberg in zuccatti park. I am a living ghost, a new york legend now apart of a revolution. Bloomberg attacked our park. Bloomberg will have a watergate.
And the public don't dwell on my transmission
'Cause it wasn't televised
But it was the turning point
Oh what a lonely night
-Little Nemo
(christopher)
A Caitlin Rodriguez Production
Little Nemo on HBO
11/22/2011
black caitlin heart
the school of visual arts church of silver tiles day 393/8 james hughes days
I am made out of the skyine I see this scene in made in America where they're on the boat and one of the main characters is on a boat affront the skyline for years I have dreamed of a factory that will never be a tv station. When all I needed was my medication to find my way to the other side. I'm with one of our ceos anyone who gets me my medication. I dream I live of our skyline. Of Manhattan. I am made of the island of manhattan, your channel should be at our shore in williamsburg, at the factory that has been the center of my existence since 2008. Just because I dream does not make it real. I love you.
Later in the night I end up @ Goodbye Blue Monday on broadway in east williamsburg. I see one of our occupy wall street signs. This is the way to communicate to me if anybody knew I existed. The band mentions hackers, if art hacking was real in this thing you'd mention this. You'd mention this because I need help to get to the other side. The plague is Harvey Weinstein and I gave the disc to the enemy for a period of time. I am crash overwrite I need help to reach the other side. They play Elton John. You'd mention Elton John if you knew I existed because everything I do in fashion in based on him. I find on the myrtle avenue stop a sin's world hat. I wear this because I have to keep telling myself I'm Lucifer to make sense out of being in this thing which allowed me to spend my $ and destroyed my credit rating.
I watch the video where I throw Dale Carnegie on my roof top in hell's kitchen and I'm manipulated into burning the book Arun gave to me from Easton that I used to place my dream diaries and wrote my religion. Helicopters are in this video, they were for me then not literally but I'm told this. The last time I saw helicopters is when we were attacked by Bloomberg in zuccatti park. I am a living ghost, a new york legend now apart of a revolution. Bloomberg attacked our park. Bloomberg will have a watergate.
And the public don't dwell on my transmission
'Cause it wasn't televised
But it was the turning point
Oh what a lonely night
-Little Nemo
(christopher)
A Caitlin Rodriguez Production
Little Nemo on HBO
11/22/2011
black caitlin heart
the school of visual arts church of silver tiles day 393/8 james hughes days
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
6th avenue occupy
cailtin,
It's been a long time since I've at all felt apart of humanity. There are several notes that I wrote while walking to Judson Memorial Church, I thought I'd attempt to place this off of memory, I suppose I'll attempt to intermix the two. Otherwise my blog will never express in any way, let alone the sadness that the police attack a peaceful movement for no apparent reason. I'm forced to sleep before films but I covered this already, how somebody had me leave before the police attacked us. My Al, the guardian angel James Hughes who watches over me in my quantum leap of hell. It's a spiritual force of the school of visual arts, this is what I believe Hughes to be the deepest possible friend, the belief of an angel within a man, as I believe in you as my wife beyond dreams and a body where one can possess thoughts, beyond fear and a world where my life has ended. I mention Spalding Grey in my notes an egotistical reference to the fact that he felt nervous, that his journals are published, the he committed suicide in the east river and in my childhood on my father's flat screen I remember his 2 hour rant of a film. I'm supposed to insert ego in the thing I'm in, I don't have a choice. This reference to Spading Grey stays in my auto new york repertoire but seems absurd after the events of seeing occupy wall street invaded. Something beautiful invaded for no apparent reason, there are lies about feces in local venues garbage cans written in the Metro, things that were never done I don't know why these lies are spread. These are the only people who have welcomed me as this lonely creature that I've become these days walking the earth searching for my medicine writing to you arguing with nothing, this strange mason or what have you entrance exam this thing is. I don't want to be a mason I want to be a man but none of this matters for the thing that I'm in, you can't quit you have to reach the end, no choice. We can create a tv station in williamsburg, brooklyn if I ever reach the other side, there's a mass amount of cash I'll be signing over to you. I see Bonnie and Clyde in Time Out New York, the beauty of the comfort station is remembered my love for fashion, the dream that I could look like a man as a creature people speak through. I wish I lived on the runway, with people on the runway, I almost had a job for video fashion in 2008 with my hvx and still live in this moment. Perhaps I can find work as an editor. I can't take the homeless poverty I've been forced into, I don't know why I'm forced into this homeless poverty, I don't want to stay in the depression of a shelter, I'd rather sleep in a tent and represent something. Nobody will come to me no matter how I ask them on the other side, it's not the sort of thing you can quit. You rigged me to question all of this the desperation of searching for the way out is the journey taken off pause, the horror of the reality of what this is. On the walk to Judson last night a brother hands me a water and food, recognizes me, police surround us on our walk, somebody later pounds me fist inside the church which welcomes us to sleep for the night, it's rare anyone recognizes me, it feels nice for somebody to know I'm alive, day and night all I know are echoes of people, distant references to roommates I had who the people on the other end used to play the role of while the friends we had in youth think I'm homeless, I live the sin and shame of my existence. Still refusing to live with my biological father that sometimes is demanded as a class status insult, I see this as another way they shit on Gunnar while he was alive now as he's dead, I'll never forgive this thing for allowing him to die with me trapped in this, but this isn't what they ask right now, it's a small absurd thing, actually incredibly deep but it goes away when I get them out of my eye. Hughes explains this, but it's the insult of inhumanity that I live. I dream of bloomberg's watergate for associating to me and for what he did to occupy wall street. I tell somebody this in the morning of Judson Memorial Church, how there's claims he spoke through me. Perhaps the exposure is not yet. Hughes rigs me something if anything a dream of a girl named Lauren with green hair who's apart of the movement I could will internally to hook up with, it's been a long time since I've had any form of a crush or fantasy. I've been trapped in a nightmare hell, I'd write to you about this. Judson Memorial Church is a symbol of a place I still live as the arcade fire kid, I listen to Neon Bible in this moment and a small cliche version of you exists, telling me small intellect words nothing of the emotional depth of my love for you (i didn't listen to fevers and mirrors which is merited in my world but not at the level of what I needed to represent in that moment of the arcade fire and my belief in the movement to restore me as a man). I still need cash, have to write in the apple store until I panhandle an iPad, get a job in film, find a way to survive as I enter this journey. I create art I live with the hope that you'll marry me, I write notes of events that happened that you'll never know about like the hbo Bill Mahr promotions I made for the channel I dream of you owning at Domino Sugar named Little Nemo (programming written at penn station of tv shows that never happened but I was promised were filmed, lied to and believed this daily) on these spray painted Bill Mahr posters I found outside Live With Animals on Metropolitan Avenue, moments like this are key to me in my dream of a television station I was told existed. I was told people were inside Domino Sugar for years but nobody was inside this place. I have been placed on a journey of limbo, I hoped somebody might acknowledge me at occupy wall street, but I know you placed me there as a digital ghost. Tuxedo Mask of Easton, CT dreaming of the white lady caitlin rodriguez to marry. As I eat, as I sleep as I smoke I pray to you hoping you're out there somewhere that somebody has told you that I exist that this is happening. So many people played you throughout the years, I hope you know of my existence. I trust nobody who says they're you knowing how many people are on my eye. I pray you've taken all god function.
I pray internally that occupy wall street continues to exist, to eat without stealing to be clothed to have others who believe in a cause to have the beauty of hope and a community. I don't understand why the nypd would break such a thing up. I'd follow them to dc (a man mentions this next to the crush girl lauren) but then Hughes mentions staying. Lauren mentions Brooklyn. I wish I was directly apart of Brooklyn but I'm apart of nothing in limbo dreaming of a party in Williamsburg where somebody knows I exist but there's nothing inside of me. I write cellar door dreaming this will all go away that I could somehow teleport home to my dorm room and music from Donnie Darko, mad world, plays inside the apple store, it leads me to believe somebody in this store knows I exist but even this is a lie something planned by James Hughes where you and him now control this god level of knowing the thoughts of others. The mayor is the reason I have a jail record, I just want to be a man I don't want to be an overlord but I have to tell myself a story about being Brandon Flowers, give myself an ego in the moments of this nightmare to get through. Maybe it waters down the art, perhaps it lowers the emotional depth of something that's happening to me happening to a man, perhaps it misses the emotional point I wish to reach in your heart, I don't know because I'm trapped on my end. I love you.
-Little Nemo
(christopher)
A Caitlin Rodriguez Production
Little Nemo on HBO
11/15/2011
black caitlin heart
the school of visual arts church of silver tiles day 386/8 james hughes days
It's been a long time since I've at all felt apart of humanity. There are several notes that I wrote while walking to Judson Memorial Church, I thought I'd attempt to place this off of memory, I suppose I'll attempt to intermix the two. Otherwise my blog will never express in any way, let alone the sadness that the police attack a peaceful movement for no apparent reason. I'm forced to sleep before films but I covered this already, how somebody had me leave before the police attacked us. My Al, the guardian angel James Hughes who watches over me in my quantum leap of hell. It's a spiritual force of the school of visual arts, this is what I believe Hughes to be the deepest possible friend, the belief of an angel within a man, as I believe in you as my wife beyond dreams and a body where one can possess thoughts, beyond fear and a world where my life has ended. I mention Spalding Grey in my notes an egotistical reference to the fact that he felt nervous, that his journals are published, the he committed suicide in the east river and in my childhood on my father's flat screen I remember his 2 hour rant of a film. I'm supposed to insert ego in the thing I'm in, I don't have a choice. This reference to Spading Grey stays in my auto new york repertoire but seems absurd after the events of seeing occupy wall street invaded. Something beautiful invaded for no apparent reason, there are lies about feces in local venues garbage cans written in the Metro, things that were never done I don't know why these lies are spread. These are the only people who have welcomed me as this lonely creature that I've become these days walking the earth searching for my medicine writing to you arguing with nothing, this strange mason or what have you entrance exam this thing is. I don't want to be a mason I want to be a man but none of this matters for the thing that I'm in, you can't quit you have to reach the end, no choice. We can create a tv station in williamsburg, brooklyn if I ever reach the other side, there's a mass amount of cash I'll be signing over to you. I see Bonnie and Clyde in Time Out New York, the beauty of the comfort station is remembered my love for fashion, the dream that I could look like a man as a creature people speak through. I wish I lived on the runway, with people on the runway, I almost had a job for video fashion in 2008 with my hvx and still live in this moment. Perhaps I can find work as an editor. I can't take the homeless poverty I've been forced into, I don't know why I'm forced into this homeless poverty, I don't want to stay in the depression of a shelter, I'd rather sleep in a tent and represent something. Nobody will come to me no matter how I ask them on the other side, it's not the sort of thing you can quit. You rigged me to question all of this the desperation of searching for the way out is the journey taken off pause, the horror of the reality of what this is. On the walk to Judson last night a brother hands me a water and food, recognizes me, police surround us on our walk, somebody later pounds me fist inside the church which welcomes us to sleep for the night, it's rare anyone recognizes me, it feels nice for somebody to know I'm alive, day and night all I know are echoes of people, distant references to roommates I had who the people on the other end used to play the role of while the friends we had in youth think I'm homeless, I live the sin and shame of my existence. Still refusing to live with my biological father that sometimes is demanded as a class status insult, I see this as another way they shit on Gunnar while he was alive now as he's dead, I'll never forgive this thing for allowing him to die with me trapped in this, but this isn't what they ask right now, it's a small absurd thing, actually incredibly deep but it goes away when I get them out of my eye. Hughes explains this, but it's the insult of inhumanity that I live. I dream of bloomberg's watergate for associating to me and for what he did to occupy wall street. I tell somebody this in the morning of Judson Memorial Church, how there's claims he spoke through me. Perhaps the exposure is not yet. Hughes rigs me something if anything a dream of a girl named Lauren with green hair who's apart of the movement I could will internally to hook up with, it's been a long time since I've had any form of a crush or fantasy. I've been trapped in a nightmare hell, I'd write to you about this. Judson Memorial Church is a symbol of a place I still live as the arcade fire kid, I listen to Neon Bible in this moment and a small cliche version of you exists, telling me small intellect words nothing of the emotional depth of my love for you (i didn't listen to fevers and mirrors which is merited in my world but not at the level of what I needed to represent in that moment of the arcade fire and my belief in the movement to restore me as a man). I still need cash, have to write in the apple store until I panhandle an iPad, get a job in film, find a way to survive as I enter this journey. I create art I live with the hope that you'll marry me, I write notes of events that happened that you'll never know about like the hbo Bill Mahr promotions I made for the channel I dream of you owning at Domino Sugar named Little Nemo (programming written at penn station of tv shows that never happened but I was promised were filmed, lied to and believed this daily) on these spray painted Bill Mahr posters I found outside Live With Animals on Metropolitan Avenue, moments like this are key to me in my dream of a television station I was told existed. I was told people were inside Domino Sugar for years but nobody was inside this place. I have been placed on a journey of limbo, I hoped somebody might acknowledge me at occupy wall street, but I know you placed me there as a digital ghost. Tuxedo Mask of Easton, CT dreaming of the white lady caitlin rodriguez to marry. As I eat, as I sleep as I smoke I pray to you hoping you're out there somewhere that somebody has told you that I exist that this is happening. So many people played you throughout the years, I hope you know of my existence. I trust nobody who says they're you knowing how many people are on my eye. I pray you've taken all god function.
I pray internally that occupy wall street continues to exist, to eat without stealing to be clothed to have others who believe in a cause to have the beauty of hope and a community. I don't understand why the nypd would break such a thing up. I'd follow them to dc (a man mentions this next to the crush girl lauren) but then Hughes mentions staying. Lauren mentions Brooklyn. I wish I was directly apart of Brooklyn but I'm apart of nothing in limbo dreaming of a party in Williamsburg where somebody knows I exist but there's nothing inside of me. I write cellar door dreaming this will all go away that I could somehow teleport home to my dorm room and music from Donnie Darko, mad world, plays inside the apple store, it leads me to believe somebody in this store knows I exist but even this is a lie something planned by James Hughes where you and him now control this god level of knowing the thoughts of others. The mayor is the reason I have a jail record, I just want to be a man I don't want to be an overlord but I have to tell myself a story about being Brandon Flowers, give myself an ego in the moments of this nightmare to get through. Maybe it waters down the art, perhaps it lowers the emotional depth of something that's happening to me happening to a man, perhaps it misses the emotional point I wish to reach in your heart, I don't know because I'm trapped on my end. I love you.
-Little Nemo
(christopher)
A Caitlin Rodriguez Production
Little Nemo on HBO
11/15/2011
black caitlin heart
the school of visual arts church of silver tiles day 386/8 james hughes days
They attack (nypd)
Caitlin,
There is no reason for the nypd to attack us. A peaceful community of zuccatti park attacked for no reason this is the only place i have been able to call home in years in this nightmare, helicopters swarm above. The police brigade stretches to canal street, when I arrive at the park police with billy cubs are hittIng and spraying. A notice is given we are not to return with tents, perhaps Bloomberg threatened Brookfield who seemed to be a friend prior to this. I take notes on a Newsweek with Seinfeld, provided for free by our occupy wall street library which the police are currently attacking. I took the last of my medication, if I was to die I'd cry revolution with my Fellow modern day yippies. I send Bloomberg a personal digital fuck you, using your concept of a digital ghost lost in time. I need another iPad I'm having problems getting into best buy. I need somebody to directly acknowledge this is happening. The occupiers are the only people who give a fuck if I'm alive. I still at this point have to speak to Hughes in the air. I pray he is in my body. Hughes saved me by having me see a film at Chelsea cinemas, Martha, Marcy, I'd look this up but I don't want the blog to reset. I'm deb from empire records everyone on broadway right now is from empire records the nypd is clearing out the lost children attacking our community for no reason, Abbie Hoffman is being created the enemy is the republican mayor Bloomberg. The only hope I see for the world is occupy wall street the only beauty on earth they're attacking. I will follow my people. Bloomberg lives on 79th/broadway a homeless man shouted. I think of the paper machet gun from North 12th street that represents my dream that someone will shoot him. A first response officer yells shame on you to the NYPD he cheers for the fireman and prays the NYPD kids died in 9/11 and feels shame for what he did a decade ago. He earlier complained fellow new Yorkers shit on him, he showed his prescriptions as he protested by the tree of life where nightly meditations happened. I still wear my clothes from the comfort station, I am fed by occupy. This is the only time I am mentally well. My medication costs $300 nobody gives a shit in the thing I'm in. Nobody will come and pay me, I tell the people on the other end I am with occupy. This will change nothing on their end, despite some seeming to believe in a tv station of occupy wall street, or I am hopeful and have Stockholm syndrome. A man with a rat cannot get an inhaler, we're to meet on canal street and 8th. Somebody in a blog asks if I'm adapted to my Williamsburg, Brooklyn homelessness; I did not ask to be a hostage I want my life back, occupy wall street directly gives as hit. Somebody brings up the man who represents Williamsburg community direct economy but this does not help unless I can reach the end of little nemo and create a tv station. Domino sugar will never be little nemo but this should be occupy wall street tv. You're tv station. There are several cameras, my mini dv is not charged. I want my DVD back I want my life back. I guess Hughes guided me. I love you.
A Caitlin Rodriguez production
Little Nemo on HBO
11/14/2011
Black Caitlin heart
The school of visual arts church of silver tiles day 385/8 James Hughes days
I would have had the speech from v for vendetta and a welcome Matt from the east village by my tent if they didn't do this. V for vendetta means loyalty to you. From a pirated tv station (1985 is Hughes birth year)
I believe my friend is out there. I cried in my tent and prayed to Gunnar Agerholm in this time. There is still beauty, perhaps the nicest parts of hell. NIN quote. I love you.
-little nemo
(Christopher)
There is no reason for the nypd to attack us. A peaceful community of zuccatti park attacked for no reason this is the only place i have been able to call home in years in this nightmare, helicopters swarm above. The police brigade stretches to canal street, when I arrive at the park police with billy cubs are hittIng and spraying. A notice is given we are not to return with tents, perhaps Bloomberg threatened Brookfield who seemed to be a friend prior to this. I take notes on a Newsweek with Seinfeld, provided for free by our occupy wall street library which the police are currently attacking. I took the last of my medication, if I was to die I'd cry revolution with my Fellow modern day yippies. I send Bloomberg a personal digital fuck you, using your concept of a digital ghost lost in time. I need another iPad I'm having problems getting into best buy. I need somebody to directly acknowledge this is happening. The occupiers are the only people who give a fuck if I'm alive. I still at this point have to speak to Hughes in the air. I pray he is in my body. Hughes saved me by having me see a film at Chelsea cinemas, Martha, Marcy, I'd look this up but I don't want the blog to reset. I'm deb from empire records everyone on broadway right now is from empire records the nypd is clearing out the lost children attacking our community for no reason, Abbie Hoffman is being created the enemy is the republican mayor Bloomberg. The only hope I see for the world is occupy wall street the only beauty on earth they're attacking. I will follow my people. Bloomberg lives on 79th/broadway a homeless man shouted. I think of the paper machet gun from North 12th street that represents my dream that someone will shoot him. A first response officer yells shame on you to the NYPD he cheers for the fireman and prays the NYPD kids died in 9/11 and feels shame for what he did a decade ago. He earlier complained fellow new Yorkers shit on him, he showed his prescriptions as he protested by the tree of life where nightly meditations happened. I still wear my clothes from the comfort station, I am fed by occupy. This is the only time I am mentally well. My medication costs $300 nobody gives a shit in the thing I'm in. Nobody will come and pay me, I tell the people on the other end I am with occupy. This will change nothing on their end, despite some seeming to believe in a tv station of occupy wall street, or I am hopeful and have Stockholm syndrome. A man with a rat cannot get an inhaler, we're to meet on canal street and 8th. Somebody in a blog asks if I'm adapted to my Williamsburg, Brooklyn homelessness; I did not ask to be a hostage I want my life back, occupy wall street directly gives as hit. Somebody brings up the man who represents Williamsburg community direct economy but this does not help unless I can reach the end of little nemo and create a tv station. Domino sugar will never be little nemo but this should be occupy wall street tv. You're tv station. There are several cameras, my mini dv is not charged. I want my DVD back I want my life back. I guess Hughes guided me. I love you.
A Caitlin Rodriguez production
Little Nemo on HBO
11/14/2011
Black Caitlin heart
The school of visual arts church of silver tiles day 385/8 James Hughes days
I would have had the speech from v for vendetta and a welcome Matt from the east village by my tent if they didn't do this. V for vendetta means loyalty to you. From a pirated tv station (1985 is Hughes birth year)
I believe my friend is out there. I cried in my tent and prayed to Gunnar Agerholm in this time. There is still beauty, perhaps the nicest parts of hell. NIN quote. I love you.
-little nemo
(Christopher)
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